What Eric has learned

So since Shayla and Jon have both done this, I figure I'd better post something on the subject as well. Though, I'm not as intelligent as they are, I don't think as deeply, and I haven't been on as many dates, so I don't have very much to say.

First off, I might end up saying some things that could offend some people. I hope not to, but if I do... I'm not sorry, and it's probably your fault if you get offended (honest). What I've learned more than anything is that this is what I should have been doing since I got home from my mission - focus on dating. As has been mentioned before, most of us in the LDS young single adult world have heard, read or at least heard about Elder Oaks' talk on Dating vs Hanging Out. I heard this just before I came home from my mission for the first time. So I knew that I was supposed to be focusing on dating, rather than hanging out. For the last (almost) 3 years, I have been trying to do just that. Over the summer, I set a goal to go on one date a week, and I only missed twice. I thought that was pretty good! However, since being involved in this "Dating Race", I've realized that I wasn't completely focused on dating over hanging out. So my lesson is for the guys:

You need to be dating. You need to be asking girls out regularly. You need to experience rejection, awkwardness, and how much MORE fun dating is than hanging out. Grow up, get out of High School mode, and ASK GIRLS OUT. I promise, you won't regret it. My mom suggested to me to ask 3 girls out, and then once you understand them pretty well, drop one and ask another out in her place, so you continuously are dating 3 girls (without strong commitment at first) until you realize what it is you want in a girl, and pick that one! I'm not that organized, so I won't necessarily follow that plan, but I do plan on being more continuous in my efforts to date. I know of a lot of young single men, returned missionaries, who lackadaisically hang out with groups of people regularly, as a replacement to dating. Let me tell you - if you're one of them - it doesn't work. I've learned that there is a best way to do most things, and for furthering yourself in the Lord's plan - DATING is it. Now, I'm not saying there's anything wrong with the OCCASIONAL group activity, but that should NOT be your primary social interaction with others. If I were speaking or something I'd probably repeat that. But here I can tell you to read it again. Read it again. :) It makes me sad to hear of amazing young single adult women who haven't been on a date in a while, because it means that very few guys are asking girls out. I would say that more than 50% of the girls you ask out would be willing to at least go out once with you. Yeah, you'll get rejected and probably hurt. That's life. I can also tell you that if you make dating less formal and more fun, that it will be more fun, and less formal! Weird, huh? A first date is just that - a first date. Don't worry so much, just have fun!

Anyways, I'll get off my soap-box. I don't even know if anyone will read it and care, but that's how I feel about it.

So. That's what I have to say to the guys. About the girls. There are so many amazing young ladies out there. I haven't dated a ton of them, but throughout my life I've gotten to know many, and I couldn't be more amazed at your strength and goodness. There is nothing more beautiful than a pure, modest woman who knows who she is and lives like she knows it. My mom and sisters are a good example - if you need one. (Sorry, I hope I don't embarrass you girls by saying that, but it's true!)

Also, I've learned that people are more interested in dating stories and things like this than I thought.  I'm amazed at how many follow this blog.

And lastly, Jon and Shayla, you amaze me. I thought that 10 dates would be enough to keep me in close rankings with you guys, but I was so wrong! I am thoroughly impressed. Molodtsi! (Translation: Great job!)