A New Perspective

I've been meaning for quite a while to update you with the lessons I've learned this month so far. At the beginning of the month I had specific ideas of what would happen this month. However, there have been things that have caught me completely off-guard. So here are some moments that have changed my perspective on dating:

• With just over a week left in the competition, I guess I can admit to Eric and Shayla that there have been times when I considered giving up. This competition is very exhausting. I have spent tons of time planning date activities, deciding who to take to each activity, and calling girls. After the date, I have to make sure I remember to post the blog entry within 24 hours (which can be really difficult sometimes), and I often stay up late at night on the computer. The dates were all fun and worth it, but it hasn't gotten any easier asking girls out and planning dates.
• Coming up with a best quality, highlight, what I admired, and descriptive word has probably changed my perspective more than anything else. I haven't ever been in the habit of doing this on my dates, so it's been hard sometimes to remember the small details of the date. One day a dawn of realization hit me when everything I've written in those areas is something I'm looking for in a relationship. The best quality is generally the most important thing to me about her. The things I admire are the ways I want to be treated. And the highlights are the moments I want to share the most.
• In paying attention to the positive things about my dates, I've noticed things about each of these girls that I'm sure most people don't notice. This has made each of these girls that much more attractive to me. I've decided that even after this competition, after every date I go on I'll make sure to write down the positive things about the date.
• Blind dates are awesome and we should set each other up on dates more often. Whoever decided that blind dates are unpleasant has ruined dating for most people (okay, the occasional blind date isn't that great, but 6 of my 14 dates this month have been blind dates and they've all been awesome.
• People have asked me a lot this month whether one of my dates has stood out above the rest that I really want to pursue. It's an uncomfortable question for me to answer, because I have redefined dating to a certain degree--at least for myself. I have seen so much that I'm attracted to, in each of the girls I've been out with, that there's almost no way I could make a decision to pursue one of them without going out with several of them again. Most people aren't necessarily themselves on the first date anyways. I'm astonished at how amazing all these girls have turned out to be.
  
• I get depressed whenever one of my dates hints that she thinks our date is just for the competition. I wish they could all understand that the competition is only the catalyst that gets me to ask her out. I probably wouldn't have ever gone out with half the girls I took out this month if it weren't for this competition (especially the blind dates). But every girl I asked out was someone I have wanted to take out. And I'm always looking for blind dates.
• I've had lots of conversations with Eric and Shayla about this conversation. They are incredible friends and I can guarantee that they're just as sincere about their dates as I am with mine. I have tons of respect for both of them, and know that anyone who goes out with them is lucky to spend time with them.

That's all I can think of right now (it's really late). This has been a very humbling experience, and yet very rewarding at the same time. I have absolutely no regrets about doing the competition.